21st July 2013

Baby girl,

It's your one month celebration today. Daddy went to buy decorations for you early in the morning, but took the longest time ever. In the end, he only bought a balloon and three posters with Uncle Shaun. OH my!

The food was from Neo Garden, it tasted great and looks good too. Everyone came piling in. It's really insane how many people your grandma Lily invited. Almost 50 over. But it was worth the effort when they kept giving you gifts and hongbaos, which was very useful to buy you milk powder. Aunty Mallory and Aunty Melissa were great. They gave a hongbao AND milk powder. haha.

We also had to order ang ku kways for you too by Sweetest Moments. It tasted great and really was a pretty sight. God is great. He provided for us finances to support all these arrangements for everyone.

Everyone came just for you. God bless.

Btw darling, you were dressed in a retro dress. You look gorgeous. And Uncle Alvin purposely put the hairband on your head. You dislike it, but we quickly took pictures to remember the moment.

By the end of today, Mummy is EXHAUSTED. But it all went so well. Love you to bits darling... while mummy dreads another party like that.

20th July 2013

Dearest Netanya,

Today, Grandma Lily and Great Grandma were busy making your glutinous rice for your one month celebration, so Daddy and I brought you out! We had to bring you to visit Ah Gong and Nanna Rose to pass them their goodies (ang koo kuay and red eggs). So Daddy and Mummy packed your things to get set for the day!

When we visited Ah Gong, he was really surprised. Normally when Mummy visits Ah Gong, he will only sit, look up and say come in. But when he saw you, he immediately rushed out of the house, just to give you a peck on your cheek. See how much he adores you?! Then we brought you in and Ah Gong had one of the best afternoons ever.

Then we had to go to meet Nanna Rose. We went to her place to pick her up and headed down to Vivocity to meet Uncle David there. We had a lovely dinner at Marche. You were a sweetie pie. Slept as sweet and quietly. Not bad for a first time out.You love looking up the lights in your pram and were so entertained. What a good girl you are.

Not a bad day for your first outing baby girl.

Love you loads.

10th-12th July 2013

Just a quick update.

Mummy found out i had a blood clot in my head that caused my strokes by doing the MRI scans at Mt E Novena Hospital. So immediately, Dr Ng, my neurosurgeon, admited me in to put me under medication before another stroke comes. Had 13 blood tests, 2 heart major checks, head scans, etc. Insane.

SO mummy stayed 3 days without you in hospital, which is the hardest thing to do right now. And mummy has to take blood thinning medication (Plavix) and cholesterol medication (crestor) in order to be healthy and recover faster. But darling girl... God is great. I believe all the prayers and love he has covered us with, he bless mummy to recover so fast and for the medication to work so well. And bless us we good doctors too to find the cause and treatments for me, and also not forgetting, the finances to finance my hospital bill... It cost mummy more than $10,000. THANK GOD FOR INSURANCE.

Mumym didnt' tell many people about this because all i wanted was rest... SO it was pretty hush hush until Grandma Nanna told everyone i was sick... aiyoh.

Mummy cried alot these days because i miss you so much and i question why i have to suffer so much too. It's barely two weeks since i gave birth to you, and now this. But darling girl, I never doubt God and keep praising his name. And i believe by doing so, help me recover faster. He even provided us prayer warriors, total strangers from SFX and it was like the whole church was praying for us. We are always so grateful to all of them.

But mummy has to stop breastfeeding you now because of the medication. Hope you understand. And i'll keep praying that God strengthens you, physically, spiritually and emotionally.

Ps: Daddy suffered alot too. he had to run up and down to you and me and he was exhausted. But he always kept a smiling loving face. God bless him dearly. He really put up a good brave front, when inside, he was fearful of losing mummy... Daddy also brought me one of your booties. The moment i saw it and smelt it, mummy cried... i miss you so much. But i will get well because mummy is going to be there for you when you grow up.

Love you so much.

9th July 2013

It happened again.

I was sitting on the couch, and holding you on my right side. Again it happened. I was talking to Nanna over the phone, and suddenly i started slurring, dropped the phone and and i couldn't move. I knew something is wrong dear. I cried. I called Grandma Lily to take you safely. What's wrong with me... I called daddy and the Dr Ong. We have an appointment to see him tonight.


Night time:

Dr Ong said it's a stroke. I have to do an MRI. My dear girl... what's going on. I don't want to die and not see you grow up... My heart breaks dear. Big time.

8th July 2013

Mummy is worried over your rashes, poop colour and colic. But Doc Simon Ng said you were healthy, and gave medicine for your colic. Thank God. People were saying i was overdoing things, but you know what? Being a first time Mum will cause you to react like that because we worry out of love. Sometimes i wish all these people will just shush up.

1st July 2013

I think it's the Postnatal blues that sinked in. It's so sad and depressing. And because it's confinement time, i couldn't go out of the house. I was angry with everyone for no apparent reason. But Ah Gong adviced me to get out of the house. Take a walk. I'm glad i did. It really helped my sanity. You know what darling, confinement can be followed to an extent only. Do not follow everything as not everything makes sense.

I took a walk in the nearby park, and really enjoyed the scenary. I can't wait to take you out for a walk in the gardens. I hope you'll like what you see... Perhaps garden by the bay one day? :)