17 October 2013

Mummy loves coming home, taking you out for your walks at the park before your bath. You look so sweet when you gaze at the trees. You love trees. You always seem to be amaze by it, smile with a big grin whenever you see a tree. How fascinating!

And my little one, you truly know how to get your dad around your finger. Everytime he comes home, you’ll smile and indicate to be carried and then followed by all the complaints, screams and tantrums for the day! Haha. But only for Daddy… what a wonder.

14 October 2013

Dearest girl,

Today, you turned for the first time on your own. You turned left, first your legs then your arms. But you kept squirming and squeaking when you turn. What joy you bring. You know, you can be quite feisty when you cant turn. You get all frustrated and scream. What an ambitious one you are darling girl. I’m so proud of you.

12-14 October 2013

Darling girl… you’ve gone out so much this weekend. First, it’s Esplanade, Marina square, Fort Canning Hill, Raffles City, Tanglin Halt, Harbourfront, Vivocity, Chinatown,etc… Daddy and Mummy are tired. And so are you sweetheart. Hehe.

2nd October 2013

This whole week my dear, Mummy is taking a cab home right after work to spend as much time with you. You are such a motivation.

1st October 2013

Mummy finally has to go back to work today, and guess what? I’m so saddened that you started blowing bubbles when I’m not around! What a huge miss! How I wish I was there. My heart broke just to hear that you did that when I’m not there… 

23rd September 2013

Today my dear, Mummy laid you on your tummy. and you suddenly, turned by yourself back to your back! All by your self! Im so proud of you. Gosh, what an improvement! Ive been trying to help you practice turning and crawling. I hope it motivates you to turn and crawl too. And Nanna was around today. And guess what my dear? All you did was chatter away. You can realllly talk! But what sweet sounds you make. I wonder what you are trying to say. But just listening to you is simply a joy. My little chatterbox.

And you are such a ticklish fella. Nanna stroke your tummy and you giggled and you raised your legs. It was a real adorable sight!!! what a sweetheart.

You have been drooling alot too. I wonder if you are teething soon. But so far, no signs of any tooth. We will wait and see. :)

I tried cutting your nails today dear. And im so sorry. today is the first day, when mummy accidentally cut your finger. You did not scream, but took it rather courageously. But im so sorry for hurting you. you bled a little, so we quickly put antiseptic and covered with your mittens. But goodness... seeing the blood ive caused just made me feel miserable... sorry my dear for cutting your finger.

21st September 2013

Baby girl you are 3 mths old today! How fast has the time gone! We have dressed you all doll up now... gosh you have the sweetest smiles. I honestly cant stop kissing you and holding you. I truly dread going back to work in a weeks time. But baby girl... you love tummy time and you always get so happy when you stand up. Tried carrying you in the air and you love being high above. What a lovely girl you are. Ahma has planned a lunch today for Carol Akka family and Uncle Michael family to come by to see you and taste her Mee Siam. Oh well, i know you will be the highlight. :)

Love you so much dear. Kissing you twice now. haha.

---

Carol Akka got you a gym mat! It's a real miracle as when i have a thought of something for you, Carol always seem to get it for you! Amazing. First it was the praise baby music and now a gym mat. How wonderful God works!

During your bedtime, after mummy put you to bed, i left to the living room to watch the F1 race with daddy. Next thing we knew, we heard you screaming! I ran to check on you, and there you were all in tears and screaming at the top of your lungs. Im so sorry for leaving you alone in the room to sleep. My heart felt all torn up when you cried. My poor dear... it must be some bad nightmare or some disturbance... I was so worried, as i carried you to sleep, i prayed the rosary. Im going to do that now and put holy water on you. Im not taking any chances again. 

20th September 2013

Awwww Baby you are recovering well! The medicine is working! Praise God! You have been quite a chatterbox today and you seem alot better. Im so happy for you baby girl... Mummy will dedicate a proper regime to care for you... even your milk powder has been changed to Enfalac HA now. It's all hypoallergic and it seems to work. Love you baby... thank God.

PS: Daddy howl like a wolf and you like it. You tend to favor ducks and frogs cartoons and soft toys too... what a wonder you are :)

19 September 2013

My poor sweetheart. YOu have been diagnosed with Eczema. Your cheeks, body, underarms, groin are all covered in rashes that are painful and itchy. My poor dear, you have been scratching and crying. Thank God for leading us to Dr Woon at Bishan. He gave some ointment to bathe in and some lotion to apply. We will see if it works out.

Ps: Ahma and your grandma Lily cried seeing you like that. The moment you cry they cry too. It's so stressful for mummy... Having to care for you and to care for them. But you are my sole priority. I love you baby girl. 

3rd September 2013

Today darling you took your second injection. Daddy took his first child care leave to accompany you. He spoke to you while the injection took place, and you were so brave. You cried for a while but calm down very fast. Thank God. But before that you also had to take an oral vaccination too. Goodness... the number of vaccinations you have to take is insane... i just hope you'll grow strong my little one.

And because you did so well, Daddy bought a new toy for you, a yellow small beanie duckling. And you love it. You held it close to you, you looked adorable. Daddy also went shopping for diapers for you too. Daddy did a lot for you today... what a treat it is :)

And then while you were falling asleep, Mumym read you for your first bible story from the children's bible. It was about Elijah fearing persecution from the world, but God said He will always be with him, and so God is always with us throughout the hardships of this world.

Mummy and Daddy loves you.
And God loves you more. 

2nd September 2013

Today my dear, it was raining. And there was thunder too. Mummy was eating dinner while you had your first fright to the thunder. You blew up in tears. My dearest sweetheart... my poor poor baby. I held you tightly and didnt want to let go till you fell fast asleep. Daddy then swaddled you tightly so you felt safe. My poor baby, sorry Daddy and Mummy didn't protect you from the loud thunder.

And this afternoon, it was your first time you laid on your tummy. You were so excited. We put you on your tummy to let you see things differently. All the time you only looked up, but today you get to look down. You should have seen the joy and amazement in your face. You are so strong, you even carried your head up all by yourself. So proud of you. 

26th August 2013

Today darling, Mummy realised how much you have grown. You wore one of your cute bodysuits and you look like a sausage. My poor darling... we got to get you bigger clothes now. :)

24th August 2013

Today my dear, Mummy went out to take Aunty Regina out for her birthday lunch. So Daddy was supposed to care for you with Grandma Lily. But it didn't go well. Looks like mummy is going to start worrying when she goes back to work... oh my. 

23rd August 2013

Baby girl, you fell sick today. You started having diarrhea and we were so worried about you. Brought you to the doctor today and he said it's caused by bacteria in your bottles. Poor baby. Sorry mummy didn't clean it properly. Now, mummy will sterilise it as much as i can. And he said it is also caused by sucking your hands. So that's why today my dear, you started sucking your first pacifier. Poor baby...

21st August 2013

You keep sucking your hands darling. And while you slept next to your bolster, you actually started sucking your bolster! oh my!

And darling girl, everytime you take a bath you will smile and enjoy it. But the moment mummy takes you out of it, you scream your heart out like it's the end of the world! Goodness gracious. I am considering of putting you for baby bath sessions. There's a trial at nex for a 15min swim in your personal pool for $38 followed by  a full body massage for $24... I want to send you soon, but Daddy doesn't want to miss it so we just got to wait.

20th August 2013

Today your grandma Lily bought you your first chinese han yu pin ying book. We are so screwed about your chinese language... haha. no one to help you much at home... i guess in the future, you'll be needing some chinese language help for an enrichment centre... poor baby. 

16th August 2013

I don't know if it's considered your first word... but you called your father by his first name 'Ed-gar' twice. But when we asked you to repeat it, you couldn't. So daddy said it's not considered your first words. haha.

But just imagine... what if it was? No manners darling calling your father by his first name! haha. 

15th August 2013

You keep sucking your mittens. Bad habit darling. And today you first watched TV, and your first TV programme is Hi5! You enjoy the music and the colours, though you can't see clearly yet. But you smiled while they sang.

In the afternoon, you first had your longest outing to church for it's the Feast of Assumption celebration followed by Nanna's place.

I noticed something special today. You stared at great grandma Christina picture, and you started talking to her as if she's in front of you. What a special moment it is for me.

Love you hon.  

21st July 2013

Baby girl,

It's your one month celebration today. Daddy went to buy decorations for you early in the morning, but took the longest time ever. In the end, he only bought a balloon and three posters with Uncle Shaun. OH my!

The food was from Neo Garden, it tasted great and looks good too. Everyone came piling in. It's really insane how many people your grandma Lily invited. Almost 50 over. But it was worth the effort when they kept giving you gifts and hongbaos, which was very useful to buy you milk powder. Aunty Mallory and Aunty Melissa were great. They gave a hongbao AND milk powder. haha.

We also had to order ang ku kways for you too by Sweetest Moments. It tasted great and really was a pretty sight. God is great. He provided for us finances to support all these arrangements for everyone.

Everyone came just for you. God bless.

Btw darling, you were dressed in a retro dress. You look gorgeous. And Uncle Alvin purposely put the hairband on your head. You dislike it, but we quickly took pictures to remember the moment.

By the end of today, Mummy is EXHAUSTED. But it all went so well. Love you to bits darling... while mummy dreads another party like that.

20th July 2013

Dearest Netanya,

Today, Grandma Lily and Great Grandma were busy making your glutinous rice for your one month celebration, so Daddy and I brought you out! We had to bring you to visit Ah Gong and Nanna Rose to pass them their goodies (ang koo kuay and red eggs). So Daddy and Mummy packed your things to get set for the day!

When we visited Ah Gong, he was really surprised. Normally when Mummy visits Ah Gong, he will only sit, look up and say come in. But when he saw you, he immediately rushed out of the house, just to give you a peck on your cheek. See how much he adores you?! Then we brought you in and Ah Gong had one of the best afternoons ever.

Then we had to go to meet Nanna Rose. We went to her place to pick her up and headed down to Vivocity to meet Uncle David there. We had a lovely dinner at Marche. You were a sweetie pie. Slept as sweet and quietly. Not bad for a first time out.You love looking up the lights in your pram and were so entertained. What a good girl you are.

Not a bad day for your first outing baby girl.

Love you loads.

10th-12th July 2013

Just a quick update.

Mummy found out i had a blood clot in my head that caused my strokes by doing the MRI scans at Mt E Novena Hospital. So immediately, Dr Ng, my neurosurgeon, admited me in to put me under medication before another stroke comes. Had 13 blood tests, 2 heart major checks, head scans, etc. Insane.

SO mummy stayed 3 days without you in hospital, which is the hardest thing to do right now. And mummy has to take blood thinning medication (Plavix) and cholesterol medication (crestor) in order to be healthy and recover faster. But darling girl... God is great. I believe all the prayers and love he has covered us with, he bless mummy to recover so fast and for the medication to work so well. And bless us we good doctors too to find the cause and treatments for me, and also not forgetting, the finances to finance my hospital bill... It cost mummy more than $10,000. THANK GOD FOR INSURANCE.

Mumym didnt' tell many people about this because all i wanted was rest... SO it was pretty hush hush until Grandma Nanna told everyone i was sick... aiyoh.

Mummy cried alot these days because i miss you so much and i question why i have to suffer so much too. It's barely two weeks since i gave birth to you, and now this. But darling girl, I never doubt God and keep praising his name. And i believe by doing so, help me recover faster. He even provided us prayer warriors, total strangers from SFX and it was like the whole church was praying for us. We are always so grateful to all of them.

But mummy has to stop breastfeeding you now because of the medication. Hope you understand. And i'll keep praying that God strengthens you, physically, spiritually and emotionally.

Ps: Daddy suffered alot too. he had to run up and down to you and me and he was exhausted. But he always kept a smiling loving face. God bless him dearly. He really put up a good brave front, when inside, he was fearful of losing mummy... Daddy also brought me one of your booties. The moment i saw it and smelt it, mummy cried... i miss you so much. But i will get well because mummy is going to be there for you when you grow up.

Love you so much.

9th July 2013

It happened again.

I was sitting on the couch, and holding you on my right side. Again it happened. I was talking to Nanna over the phone, and suddenly i started slurring, dropped the phone and and i couldn't move. I knew something is wrong dear. I cried. I called Grandma Lily to take you safely. What's wrong with me... I called daddy and the Dr Ong. We have an appointment to see him tonight.


Night time:

Dr Ong said it's a stroke. I have to do an MRI. My dear girl... what's going on. I don't want to die and not see you grow up... My heart breaks dear. Big time.

8th July 2013

Mummy is worried over your rashes, poop colour and colic. But Doc Simon Ng said you were healthy, and gave medicine for your colic. Thank God. People were saying i was overdoing things, but you know what? Being a first time Mum will cause you to react like that because we worry out of love. Sometimes i wish all these people will just shush up.

1st July 2013

I think it's the Postnatal blues that sinked in. It's so sad and depressing. And because it's confinement time, i couldn't go out of the house. I was angry with everyone for no apparent reason. But Ah Gong adviced me to get out of the house. Take a walk. I'm glad i did. It really helped my sanity. You know what darling, confinement can be followed to an extent only. Do not follow everything as not everything makes sense.

I took a walk in the nearby park, and really enjoyed the scenary. I can't wait to take you out for a walk in the gardens. I hope you'll like what you see... Perhaps garden by the bay one day? :)

30th June 2013

Mummy is exhausted. Ever since i've gotten home, i couldn't rest. Daddy had to work so Mummy had to do the night shift too. So the more tired Mummy was.

Apparently, everyday since we got back, we STILL had visitors. Today too. Your cousins came over to see you. But during evening time my dear, something happened. Scared the shit out of Mummy.

I was talking to your grandma over dinner. Then suddenly, i started slurring, my left hand dropped and my left leg dropped too. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. It was one of the most scariest moment again. I ended up crying but people just kept saying it's the postnatal blues.

I called the doctor, and the nurses told me to rest properly. See if it happens again... 

24th June 2013

We get to bring you home today dear. It was exciting and yet, scary. Mummy kept wondering how am i to care for you. What if i don't understand what you want? Btw, today you don't look so chinese now. haha. You look more eurasian now. It's amazing how straight your hair is. Mummy is considering straightening my hair for you, but i rather not... lets save the money for you instead.

And gosh... the bill was a biggy one. It was almost $10,000. We had to use our medisave and pay the rest by credit card. We will slowly pay it off when we get the baby bonus. But no worries, we will start saving for you properly too...

We got you home, and Uncle Mike drew up a welcome sign for you at the entrance 'Welcome Net!'. They made your bed and freshen up your room. You got everyone excited dearie.

We changed your first poop diaper. It was a yellowish mustardly poop that didn't smell at all! And you were crying, like a small little kitten. the sweetest cry ever. You were still tiny and most clothes were too big for you. haha. But you slept most of the time. Mummy was still tired and exhausted (lack of rest and after birth) so couldn't carry you much. Nanna and Aunt Elna were the ones who set up your sterillizer and bottles... And Daddy set up the machine for breastmilk pumping... Everyone was busy the moment we touched home.

We saw your first smile. A gummy grin and it was the most perfect smile ever.

21 June 2013 - 22 June 2013

Dear,

This is your birth story.

Mummy and Daddy checked into the hospital at 12 midnight this morning so that we can be induced to bring you out upon this world. Daddy was great. He kept mummy company, cheery and had to keep everyone else updated too. First, they cleared my bowels (you should see how fast mummy ran to the toilet!) and checked my cervix. Checking the cervix is one of the most painful thing to go through. Found out mummy was already 2cm open! Yeah!
Sweetheart, mummy never ran to the toilet that fast in my life! It's actually salt water up my arse... worst feeling ever. But the toilet break was another thing itself! Daddy had to help me get out of bed because hospital beds are hard to roll in! haha. Then did the drip on my right hand, which hurt when they pricked it. But i kept telling myself you're coming soon, it's all worth it. Then they put the first dosage for inducing me, and we had to wait.

We waited for 4 hours, and mummy's cervix was only 1cm dilated. And then they had to extend it and injected me again. No dilation. Sweetheart, after 22 hours, and Mummy's cervix only opened 3cm. It was anguish and exhausting. In the end, Mummy went into distress, Doc Ong said you were in too long, so we had to have a C-sect.

Mummy was panicky though she wanted Daddy around, so we couldn't do an epidural C-sect. So we had to do a C-sect under general anesthesia. It was costly but it was needed. Do you know that C-sects are very dangerous? Mummy's life was on the line. But thank God everything went well.

Daddy said you were born at 10.30pm, and it took about an hour of you in the operation theater (Mummy stayed longer as i needed to be sewn up). They wheeled you out to Daddy (who said you looked pretty chinese looking, but perfectly gorgeous.) He cried when he saw you but wasn't very sure yet because Mummy hasn't come out yet. You were perfect darling... absolutely perfect. 3.34kg heavy and 53cm long. Full head of hair, and the cutest sweet face ever. You had a touched of jaundice, but very minimal but had a bad case of mucus. So Daddy and Mummy were wary of what special care you need (for your cute little nose)

Mummy only saw you at 4am plus when i woke up. I saw you and you were asleep. The cutest baby ever in the world. My flesh and blood. You are perfect. I can't stop saying that. You were wrapped in the white cloth and asleep. You haven't opened your eyes yet. And they had to wheel you back into the nursery because Mummy was pretty weak. But trust me, i love you even more. And you're all mine.

Daddy kept wheeling you in and out showing you to the world. We had alot of visitors in the hospital dear, in and out, and both of us couldn't have any rest. It was exhausting. But that's how great your arrival is darling. It's a great special moment.

It's all about you.

19th June 2013

Dear Girl,

There's still no sign of you yet! Gosh... i'm hoping that my water bag will break, or a few hours of contractions, but it's nothing baby girl. But you're still beautifully moving in my tummy. As i tap here, here you are sticking your elbows and knees out. Are you so comfy inside? I guess it's the water content inside. By the way, the haze from Indonesia is very bad here. I'm so concern when you are born, whether your lungs are ready for this polluted environment.

Daddy has been really busy with work too. But he's even more nervous about you. Every night i don't think he sleeps at all. He's always awake when mummy runs off to the loo for a toilet break. And then he still has to get up early for work. Poor dear...

But darling girl, we are just looking forward to seeing you... gosh... you really want mummy to go through induction on Friday? Not a slight chance you will arrive on your own baby girl? Oh well... two days ago during the Novena to Mother of Perpectual Help, Archangel Gabriel did provide a message that through suffering, there's always a bright light at the end. You're my bright light baby girl... As long God is with us.. we will be okay.

Alright girl. I can't stop thinking of something sweet... ice cream. and a session with the Golden Girls :)

Love you hon. Cant wait to see you.
xxoo

17th June 2013

Dearest Daughter of Mine...

We finally saw Dr Ong! How cool it is for you to wait till he returns so you are in safe recognizable hands...

Well darling girl, you've grown tremendously during these 2 weeks. You're now 3.2kg and we can't see your head in the scan because you have descended. Daddy is worried if your head is too big in circumference and can't come out naturally... the things we worry about now. I can't even imagine what my tushy will go through after this... ANYWAY...

Dr Ong has arrange for you to be induce on Friday 21st June. And he said that inductions take about 18 to 20 hours long before deciding if we need a C-section (an operation) to take you out. Oh my...

We are really hoping you'll come out before that baby girl... so that you'll be healthier, Mummy will recover faster, and we both will be safer. I know we are in God's hands and we have faith in His care, but still, it frightens me. And i don't like the fact that we have to try to control the situation when i believe it should be in God's natural time and plan. But I;ve been talking to you, asking you to come out soon please and that everything is going to be okay. Everyone is waiting to love you darling girl, and you're going to be alright baby girl. Everything will be alright.

And to add, Mummy have been praying to Mother of Perpetual Help since last week... a 9 day Novena to ask for her assistance with your delivery. And today ironically, was the highlight of Archangel Gabriel. And the message behind it was that through suffering, there will reap a beautiful outcome. Like how Jesus had to suffer with the passion, but ascended into heaven and saved us from all our sins. What beauty is that?! So it really hit mummy hard that i'll have to go through some sort of laborious labor... but it's all going to be worthwhile for bringing you into this world. I can't wait darling girl... i can't wait to see you and kiss you.

And tomorrow is the last day of the Novena darling. And i'm hoping maybe you'll like to come by tomorrow instead? *wink* I'll keep talking to you... and praying... and hopefully in God's hands, His miracle can take place as according to his will.

'Your will be done Oh Lord, not mine'.

Ps: Btw, we have been having bad hazy weather because of our kind Indonesian neighbors... apparently Daddy came out with a theory that because we have a dengue fever epidemic, our kind neighbors have lend a hand to help us but 'fogging' the mosquitoes away with a unhealthy range haze... it's terrible weather darling... Mummy is going to keep you indoors till all these troubles go away.

And the heat wave is so bad last night darling, and Mummy can't switch on the air-con because Daddy isn't so well, so Mummy didn't sleep at all. Because you were so uncomfortable with the heat you couldn't rest, and my feet swell up to gigantic size and was blue black all over... I couldn't walk... but oh well... another beauty of pregnancy...

16th June 2013

You're due today baby. And yet, still no sign of you popping out. Daddy was wondering if you'll wish him Fathers Day, even Ah Gong too! Everyone is excited about your coming, but still we will be patient. I just hope you'll still be healthy and safe. Can't wait for tomorrow to see Doctor Ong to check on you.

Btw, there have been an increase in sharp shooting pains down Mummy's thighs. From what i've read, it's when you push downwards onto one of the major nerves in the cervix area. Whenever it hurts, Mummy has to stop in her tracks to take a breath. How i wish it was a contraction, LOL. And Mummy is walking like a watermelon is between her tushy. Oh well, the glamorous side of pregnancy honey bun.

And Mummy's feet at looking incredible hulk looking now. I don't think i can see my ankles anymore. It looks like it's even bigger size compared to Uncle Shaun and Uncle Maurice's feet! Aiyo!

Oh well, everyday i keep thinking it's my last meal before your coming, so mummy will whack a really good meal... so tonight, we whacked Tepannyaki!!! And i must say it's sooooo nice. Yum Yum... maybe it's all these glorious food that's keeping you in... How i wonder if it stops and you'll come out? hehe... Maybe i'll just start tomorrow instead...

Love you baby girl. Muakx.

14th June 2013

Dear Netanya,

You are still not out yet... Mummy has a gut feeling you're not ready yet and it's okay. I rather you come out at your own time and ensure you're in good health, than for mummy to force you out deliberately or any other way.

But Daddy has been helping mummy deal with the inducing you out anxiety... he bought us this raspberry leaf tea that helps strengthen the womb to help during labor. and Mummy just ate some sweet pineapples... but i figured.... you actually enjoy them because there's no contractions whatsoever. Baby girl is really enjoying your good food in there aren't you? :)

Just to update... Mummy has started her craving spree again. It was pizza hut super supreme personal pan pizza at midnight two nights ago... and a Hawaiian pizza, a mushroom pizza and top off with spaghetti Bologna sauce last night... heavenly... :)

And Daddy is going to get Mummy some malay goreng pisang tonight. Whoopeedoodah!!!

Actually Mummy have been having some contractions on and off these few days, but nothing to take action on. Just two days ago, i was having 4 contractions in an hour... then nothing in the next. And yesterday was very quiet, except that when i went to the toilet, it was like something jabbing me in my vagi**... that was painful but i figured my cervix is slowly opening.... gradually. And right now darling, your sweet elbows and knees have been jabbing me around, but i'm loving it. Because i know you're growing strong and healthy...

I just hope all goes well hon. Been trying to do a Novena to Mother of Perpectual Help too to bless us for this special arrival of yours...

and baby girl... i have to keep reminding myself that i should rest because once you arrive, rest will be in the past tense.

But whatever it is girl sweetie... i'm going to love you as much as i possibly can.

Counting down 2 days to your special EDD...

11 June 2013

Dearest Girl,

It's 39 weeks and 2 days now. Are you coming soon? You are a lot more solid  now, especially your beautiful knees. It's so knobbly now and when you jab mummy in my ribs, it's really a shocking poke! But it just gives me more reason to love you more and motivation to seeing you soon. When does God plan for you to arrive darling girl... we all wonder.

Will it be today? another special '11th' in our lives? hehe. And yesterday night, Mummy ate Grandma Lily's tomato and vinegar sauce and seriously suffered... the heartburn was so bad mummy didn't sleep. And on top of that, the insomnia. But i'm just thankful that it's just a week or two. Some people suffer for weeks. Thank God. But it's a sign of your coming... how exhilarating! 

9th June 2013

Dearest Comfy Baby Girl,

What's so comfortable being in Mummy's womb that you don't want to come out? I have to admit, I cried today. I think it's also got to do with hormones, but Mummy is so going to miss you, my little secret, kicking and playing and rumbling in mummy's tummy. Do you enjoy it when mummy rubs your back or plays with your feet hide and seek? I'm going to miss that even though i know you're going to fill my life with joy and love the moment you pop. 

Mummy has been rather emotional. I guess it's the weight, the aches, the lack of rest, the noise at home, etc. But thank God Daddy takes Mummy out for a nice lunch and a little shopping for the family and Mummy feels more productive and full of life. And how can i forget, Praying. God really comforts Mummy during this time of fear and worry. Do you know that fear of labor actually makes the pain worst? SO if one day you become a mother, never fear. Leave it to God's hands. He will quicken your labor and soon you'll see his perfect masterpiece. You are afterall my dearest masterpiece. 

And you're 39 weeks old today. Can you believe it? You've made it this far? God is great, Praise The Lord! Doctor Ong is officially on his family holiday, so there are only back up doctors this week. But whatever it is dear, i have faith that God will take care of us with all his Holy Angels and Saints. So we shall not fear. But i wonder will Mummy's water bag break? Will Mummy feel a contraction soon? Right now, Mummy is only dealing with achy feet and legs, tiredness and breathlessness... I really think you put on some fat this week darling. And your body feels harder through Mummy's tummy. But you're such an amazing gift and creation. I can't stop thanking God.

And again sweetheart, you were joyfully rumbling during mass time especially during the gospel. I love it how you know when to rumble like you know God is speaking and is filled with joy and love for Him. I hope you'll always be like that with a strong christian life.

But oh well... now it's just a waiting game darling for your coming. when do you want to come out? Mummy is glad that her maternity leave started on the 3rd June... giving me time to rest, have some silence (though it hard at home sometimes with your grandma), and to just embrace the last moments of having you in Mummy's tummy. 

I so love you my child. My blessed child. I can't wait to see you and hold you and kiss you endlessly. 

I love you baby girl. 

5th June 2013

Dear Netanya,

Today Uncle Louise from church came by to visit. Uncle Sam couldn't make it, but Uncle Louise got you a beautiful pin with a medal for babies. Mummy will ask Grandma Rose to get it blessed at the church and will pin it on you everyday okay? May the Lord, Jesus, Holy Spirit, Mama Mary, St Gerard and St Joseph and all the Angels and Saints protect you. We do not worship these medals, but it is a constant reminder that they are there praying and looking out for you... like a photograph.

And Uncle Louise even prayed the whole rosary over you too. It's because they will be going for a prayer retreat and was worried if they don't get to see you on time. So you see how sweet darling girl? Mummy was very touched that he came down from one end of Singapore just to pray over you. God bless him. I hope you'll keep in touch with him as you grow up. He's a lovely young chap who wants to be a missionary when he grows up. I wonder if you'll have any spiritual vocations... how blessed would that be.

3rd June 2013

Dearest Darling Girl,

Today, Mummy went for your 3 week check up and so many things have changed. Apparently, you're still 2.8kg (which worries me...) but Mummy lost more weight now. Mummy has been feeling some intense braxton hicks (crampy feeling) so i thought we are getting there pretty soon. But to my shock, Mummy's cervix is not open yet and neither do you look like you want to come out! You looked more comfy (even Doctor Ong said that) and may want to stay in longer. I guess you have your reasons for staying. You're not ready yet. I was a little bumped out because all this while, it looked like you wanted out early, but everything changed last minute, can you believe it? I hope you'll come out before Dr Ong goes on his holiday next week... but if not, it's okay. We shall never rush into things alright baby girl?

But if you are not out by the 17 June sweetheart, we have to be induced because it's passed your due date. It's not healthy... I'm wondering if ice cream bribery might do the trick? hehe. Anyhow... you look gorgeous today. Again, your beautiful high forehead, pouty lips and chubby cheeks. Actually Daddy made a remark in the evening when he showed the picture of you that you look like Grandma Lily. But the thing is sweetie, scold me for being selfish, i wanted the resemblance only to be between daddy and me... Because you are our precious child, i just want you all mine... wierd isn't it. Oh well, but daddy saw mummy's baby picture and Mummy too has a high forehead... so thank God... Mummy managed to control her emotions...

Anyway... we have Aunty Regina learning how to crochet for you. Apparently shes trying to make some booties. How cute is that?! And Aunty Carol has been praying for you too... You're much loved and all of us are excited to see you. When will you be out my love?  

27th May 2013

Dearest Netanya,

So sorry Mummy hasn't written for so long! All is good and great so far, no worries. You're 37 weeks old now, which actually means you're full term! Can you imagine for an infertile person to carry a baby for a full term, it is a miracle itself! And yes dear, you are our miracle child! We just can't wait for your arrival... it's a matter of your time at God's time and place. We are simply just excited now.

Alright... let's see what has happened so far...

In the 3rd trimester sweetheart, you have a huge preference for sweet stuff. Not cakes darling, but Ribena. And Daddy is the only person who can make it. When Mummy makes it, you're not satisfied. You only like Daddy's version. See how you are?! heehee. But Daddy is so proud and touched to have that intimate relationship with you. He takes his Ribena responsibility very seriously. You should see him. It's like a chemical concoction that he's totally serious about!

And there was this whole week darling... Mummy was only into ice cream. And not just any ice cream... a home scoop ice cream in a waffle cone. Not a biscuit cone, but a waffle one. Soft and sweet. And i have to lick it. And guess what? During your 35 week check up, you were licking your hand and sucking your thumb! You were adorable!!! And you just kept licking without a care in this world. My heart melted. And it explained everything clearly. :)

And of course, there will always be challenges. One thing I've learned from this journey with you baby, is that positiveness and faith are key important values to hold on to. Mummy was diagnosed with Strep B. It's actually a bacteria from the intestines that has escaped and gone onto the vagina. Apparently it affects a lot of women but is harmless. It doesn't affect Mummy but it will affect you if you are born vaginally. So Mummy went on an antibiotic treatment to recover. No way will i take chance of risk on you. Never. But God is great. Bacteria was all cleared and Mummy is strep B free. Praise God! But Mummy still have to undergo antibiotic treatment when i deliver. They will put the medicine in my hand with the IV. But don't you worry my child... Mummy will go through what it takes to get you healthy and safe.

And the worst thing that is also irritating is the mould and mould mites in the bedroom! We are so worried about it because we worry if it may bite you or cause you any harm. Mummy and Daddy have been vacuuming the room thoroughly every week, cleaning the walls with dettol and trying our best to keep the room clean. But it's been difficult and frustrating baby. It's because the neighbour keeps switching their air-conditioning on and it shined upon the wall opposite us. So there's condensation within the wall. So mould grows. You see baby dear... the mites are harmless (just irritating), but the mould can cause breathing problems. Daddy says that he's going to try repainting the room... and we are hoping it will help especially before you arrive.

And darling girl... Mummy has learned something new. I've always heard of urine incontinence because the womb lies on our bladder, but have you heard of bowel incontinence? Yes my darling, it is something that has been happening and it has taught Mummy to lose her pride in every way. It has been happening quite often, so Mummy have to wear a pad constantly in secret. And that special day when Mummy thought of spending little bit more on luxurious bread from Bakers Inn was when it all happened. Mummy was selecting some nice tasty buns for Daddy, and she thought she was going to let a little fart out. So she went to a corner, like how anyone else would normally do to let out gas. But this time darling, it wasn't just gas. It was a sh-art. A combination of a deadly egg fart with watery number 2 at the same time. And Darling girl... the way you were lying on my rectum... the flow COULD NOT STOP. Mummy stood there in a corner... petrified... embarrassed... worried... all in one! Then, she walked funny to the cashier... trying to act normal while perspiring the worst hot flush ever with a guilty look. Never have i prayed so hard that no one smells anything. Thank God for making payment smooth and Mummy waddled over to the toilet to clean up. I just couldn't stop laughing and chuckling to myself. You see darling... pregnancy does have its humorous side.

Well, and it's the start of contractions too! Braxton Hicks is what they call it. Mummy have been having stronger cramps and aches in my abdomen area. There was a Friday when i felt so much discomfort in the office, i thought i was in labour. But false alarm. Then Mummy was told by another colleague that squats and eating dates will prepare the cervix well... didn't know it would trigger some aches and pains too... it's insane what Mummy will try to make delivery as smooth as possible. I've stopped with the squats. I've learned to take it slightly easy... but I'm still enjoying the occasional dates. Apparently, it helps with cervix dilation. Since we are already full term... there's no harm now baby girl.

And recently, Mummy has been undergoing this period called 'nesting'. Apparently it's a time when Mummy is on a verge of cleaning to make sure the environment is clean for your arrival and it helps with the labour jitters to come. Mummy is thankful to God and you for letting me have the energy to still go around, do my laundry, clean the room, shop, cook, clean, etc... My back aches slightly and Dr Ong says it's because of the centre of gravity changing in my body. My legs are swollen because of the salt content and the weight of the womb on my main vein. And it starts to hurt now when i walk... Btw darling girl... it officially took a solid 5 days within 2 weeks simply to wash ALL your clothes and bedding. That's long!!! But it's all so small, soft and baby smelling... gosh my dear... i love it all. I can't stop imagining how tiny you are going to be. I won't stop kissing you and loving you i promise.

And just the other day, your head was engaged in my pelvic bone, which Dr Ong said it indicated your coming real soon. (Yeah!) We are just waiting. So when i told Daddy about it, he decided to do up your cot! Do you know it's like a puzzle on its own? Daddy and I took some time figuring out how to tie everything, and it looks gorgeous. I can't wait for you to lie there and fall asleep. I can guarantee you the first few nights after your arrival, i won't stop staring at you and be amazed by God's creation. I can't wait darling for you...

So anyhow, you're weighing 2.8kg officially today at 37 weeks old. You are looking gorgeous and licking your hands and sucking your thumb as always. Are you going to be a thumb sucker?!!! hehe. Well, i hope not and that hygiene comes first. But whatever it is darling girl, I'll love you just the way you are.

I'll try to be more updated alright baby girl? Sorry for this lengthy one, but it's a combination of the highlights for the last 5 weeks.

Love you Baby girl.

PS: everyone is so excited for your coming to the point that they all get worried when Mummy goes out on her own. They worry I'll go into labour and I'm all alone. But don't you worry baby girl... Mummy has you, Mummy has God and He has taken good care for us even before day 1. So don't you worry my love... you'll be alright.

PS: Daddy was trying to think of another name instead of Gabrielle... he wanted Electra... and Mummy threw a fit. haha. I still think Gabrielle suits you better, plus it's a godly chosen name for you. I'll stand my ground for you Hon...

Love you lots.

22 April 2013

Dearest Girl,

Today Daddy and Mummy both gotten to see you for your 32 weeks check. You are absolutely gorgeous! You were so adorable, you gave us a glimpse of your pouty lips. Hehe. We wonder if you were blowing bubbles. You’re 1.7kg now and 32 weeks, that makes you 8 months old now. Dr Ong also checked Mummy’s placenta, and guess what? It’s moved! You can be born vaginally now! Yeah! Mummy was so afraid of the C section because I’ve heard that it may affect your immunity and I will have a longer time to recover too. And Dr Ong also went through the labour process with both of us and reminded us that when you want to come, you will come. There’s no specific time. But sweetheart, you are gorgeous. Absolutely perfect. We can’t wait to see you.

We went to visit Nanna Rose too about confinement food. Nanna Rose and Ahma Lily will be cooking for mummy while I recover and while you’re still tiny and less than a month old. They too are so excited for you. Everyone can’t wait to smelling you, holding you, listening to you, loving you, etc. My dearest baby girl, you’re a gift of joy to the world.

Thank God for His miracle. Only God can make the impossible possible. We will count down now to your arrival. Praise the Lord!

19 April 2013

Dear Sweetheart,

You’re coming 32 weeks now (8 months old)! Praise the Lord for everything! Recently, your hiccups are taking place more regularly like 2 to 4 times a day, especially when Mummy drinks water. Apparently, it’s because you gulp down too fast (just like mummy actually…) and it causes you to hiccup. Your movements are so much more significant, lesser though because of the space constraint, but you’re so strong. You like kicking mummy especially when mummy wants to fall asleep. But I’ll do whatever I can to make you comfy my little one. I love you my little one. And it’s so close to seeing you now. I’m counting down, though I know, I will miss the feeling of you inside, my little secretive girl.

Ps: A cup of ice cold ribena is essential every night before 9pm. We ran out of it, and Mummy became cranky. But your gorgeous father is the hero of all times and bought me a new pack. I so love him even more now. J

Pss: Realise you don’t fancy chocolate baby… you will choose strawberry ice cream over chocolate ice cream now… how interesting. And mummy has plan to have salmon 3 times a week now to help your brain development (from what I read). It’s always better to get nutrients from consuming food than just supplements… I hope you’ll grow healthy, happy and faithful darling girl.

Psss: I started calling you Muffin. Because I pray you’ll bake well in Mummy’s oven. Hehe.

Love you.

10 April 2013

Dearest baby girl,

The check up today went very well today. You’re now 1.5kg and getting more beautiful. Your legs are so long and stretched out. No wonder Mummy always feel you kicking so hard. And your face is just so small and petite. I can’t wait for you to arrive and I can kiss you all over. At night, you really gave mummy a hard time. You kicked and punched so hard and I figured you didn’t like the way I was resting. Maybe you’re feeling a bit squashed or something. But then after some adjustments, everything was okay. I just got a feeling you can be quite a strong willed girl and I’m just so intrigued. I can’t wait! And you’ve been lying on my bladder (that’s why I’m always running to the toilet). You look so comfortable lying in that way. But whatever it is, it’s okay. Anything for you baby.

Mummy has now put on 12kg and started having Braxton hicks. I have been getting really tired recently. I admit I’ve walked a lot today, but the tiredness is seeping in sweetie. But it’s a good sign. Everything is going well. Mummy brought you out for a movie ‘The Croods’. We cried, laughed and enjoyed a pack of M&Ms. You were kicking hard and all. I hope you love cartoons like Mummy… I can’t wait to bring you out for movies. Do you know Mummy loves going to the cinema? And I hope you do too… maybe it can be our mother daughter activity. So many things running through my head about you…

Love you hon.

6 April 2013

Dearest Netanya,

You’re amazing. Daddy and I have been testing if you like music and you seem to hit and rave only for music played on the piano. I wonder if you have long beautiful fingers and the talent and passion to pursue the piano. Daddy and I already plan on getting a piano for you when we get our new apartment. You see, Daddy plays the piano by ear, and Mummy is into rhythm and percussion. So there shouldn’t be any doubt that you have music in your blood!

And recently darling, your kicks and punches have been stronger. Sometimes, you’ll rub mummy’s tummy for a stretch and it’s amazing to see how you can push out so far. It’s only good because it means you’re growing and healthy. Even your little hiccups are stronger. They aren’t so little any more. I can’t wait for you to arrive. Just 10 weeks more, can you believe it? Everyday Mummy strikes out a day counting down to seeing you. Seeing you is so much more exciting that counting down during New Years!

Even Daddy and I are planning your 1 month celebration, can you believe it?!

Aw. I can’t wait to see you and kiss you and hold you. No matter your cries or tantrums, I’ll always love you my dearest girl.

(As I write this, you’re kicking me on my right side)

25 March 2013

Again my dear, I’ve caught a cold. People around us have been sick especially in the office and recently it’s been so hot, it’s unbelievable. Mummy’s feet and hands were burning hot for so many nights, Daddy had to wipe me down to bring down my temperature. We are so worried you’re affected. Again I’m on a lemon and honey diet. Mummy is so worried of taking any medication that may affect you. So thankfully Mummy got a day off today to rest. And during today my dear, guess what? You did your alien predator moves. Yup. You jab your elbows out and run it across Mummy’s tummy. I could only hold my breath and be amazed with you. And everytime I try to take a video fo you, you go all quiet. It’s like you know you’re on camera. You’re so shy. And when I put the camera down, you start your movements all over again. Can you believe it? 

23 March 2013

Sweetie, today Daddy and I went down to the Baby Fair 2013 at Expo to find your cot. You should see your dad! He was endless taking everything from each and every corner saying things like ‘she’ll look good in this’ or ‘she will need this’ or ‘we should get this, it might be useful’… you should have seen him. A once upon a time non-shopper who would get headaches in crowded places, ended up being the faster, most focused, efficient shopper of the day! And it’s just because of you. And Daddy chose so many lovely outfits and the exterior of your cot. You should have seen him. I can’t wait for you to be born and for Daddy to hold you tight. The both of you are the most beautiful people on earth that I adore and love. We will love you to bits my girl.  To bits. And it’s an understatement.

22 March 2013

It was the last antenatal class today sweetie, and you should have seen your dad. You would be so proud. He was the only guy who was practicing and remembering how to bathe you, to change you and to hold you. The rest of the fathers were being more supportive rather than involved. But you should have seen your dad. He was coming up with lists of items for your coming. You would be so proud. I was so proud of him sweetie, he really did a marvellous job. Now we shall wait and see what happens when you are around J

21 March 2013

Today sweetie is your next scan! Mummy had to go alone because Daddy had a conference training workshop to attend at Novotel Hotel. He had a blast with all the good food dearie. But nevertheless, you were always in his thoughts. Anyway, Mummy had to go through two blood tests today to test for diabetes. And Doctor Ong did a scan. You’re so big now sweetie that Doctor Ong can scan you as a whole. He had to do part by part. But you should have seen how beautiful you are. Big eyes, longest legs, cutest fingers. You were so active and rolling inside. And the safest sweetest heartbeat. You’re truly perfect. How I wish I can have a video of you… but sweetie, every jump you do inside is full of joy. You’re the size of a chinese cabbage now, and weigh approximately 1kg and will be getting heavier each day. I read that you should be growing your eye lashes now and you can see light. You look good and Praise the Lord for that. Love you so much my darling. 

18 March 2013

Dearest Sweetie,

Today you gave daddy the hardest cutest kick in the mouth! He was talking to you and singing to you (near the belly) and you gave such a sudden hard kick I literally saw you kick Daddy right on target. Daddy and I both burst out laughing. Sweetie my dear, you really crack us up J

16 March 2013

Today sweetie, your Dad attended a memorial service at Saint Andrews Cathedral and bump into Carol Akka. And guess what? She bought you 37 outfits from the UK. Apparently, she was there with Uncle Martin and Jeremy to attend Uncle Martin’s mother’s funeral. But by buying all these things for you sweetie, it helped with their grieving. And seriously sweetie, never have I seen a baby with so many clothes. You’re so blessed. You’re so loved. Everyone is just anticipating your arrival J

10 March 2013

You know a little something, now sweetheart, you can really move mummy's tummy. Everyday i look forward to your kicks, and not only can i see it happen, it feel so much stronger. Sometimes when you are not kicking enough and mummy starts to worry, i'll drink cold orange juice and lie down. ANd soon, you'll do some kicks and bring mummy comfort that you're all okay. Tummy has grown, which means you've grown tons. Apparently, you would have started putting on fat now and should weight almost 750g. You're the length of a green cucumber too. I love seeing my tummy grow because of you. But mummy has become slightly out of balance because of the weight (I weight an extra 9kg now, which is good) and i was thinking of sharing the beautiful changes mummy's body has been going through.

Firstly, pigmentation. i never knew some places are get darker which is actually normal. My breasts, my armpits are all dark in colour. and the line along the tummy? Sweetie, there's something special about you because there is a cross above the belly button. I feel you're always under God's perfect care and He put His mark on you. :) Besides my weight gain in my bum, thighs and tummy, mummy put on weight on my cheeks! Daddy says i look chipmunkie. I know daddy loves us so dearly. He always say and shows it. He's so loving. we are so lucky to have him darling. And yes dear, mummy runs to the toilet pretty often now. Sometimes i think you are using mummy's bladder as a jumping sponge. I'll rush to the toilet and it'll be only about 3 drops of pee. But whatever it is baby, you do what you need to do to grow happily, healthily, obediently and faithfully. We leave it all to The Lord.

You're 26 weeks old now darling and i'm counting down everyday. I always wonder about you. Grow well my darling. Mummy woke up late today at 8am (normally up by 6am), and took a nap during lunch time (more like a 2.5hr nap actually) and now, i'm feeling sleepy... 8.45pm... hehe. I've read that sleep is good for you, so i'll definitely catch up on it alright?

Ps: Daddy and Mummy have been attending classes to learn about you. And last Friday, learning about labour it really freaked mummy out. But thankfully with many wonderful loving people around who gone through it too, Mummy is determine to try her best to go through labour as natural as it is to have you. We will keep praying and surrender to God. Love you Hon... xxoo

7th March 2013

Dear Baby girl,

You have grown so much. I can feel you’re heavier now, especially when mummy sleeps on her side. I can't turn anymore without carrying my tummy over! I can’t wait to see how much you weight and how chubby you are now. I’ve read that you are starting to put on fat now. And your kicks sweetie are stronger each day. It’s so funny because when mummy is tired and sleeping, daddy says he can still see you tummy move very hard! To the point that mummy’s tummy will move by itself because you’re in it! You’re such a sweetheart… an amazing creature. Everyday we count down to seeing you soon. We love you so dearly our little one. God bless you.

1st March 2013

Dear Baby Girl,

Mummy noticed that whenever she has her morning cup of tea, you’ll do flips and turns and kicks like you never did before! I’m sorry if it’s too much caffeine for you (But Dr Ong said it’s alright) but it helps with Mummy’s mood swings throughout the day. I’ll get a second opinion on my next visit alright? And sweetheart, one thing I love about you is how adorable you are to kick mummy just to remind me that you’re here. And I’ll look down, and there you are my sweet girl! I’m so excited to see you soon. It’s about 3.5 to 4 months left now to your arrival. How Great is God! You’re our little surprise and miracle… Oh gosh, I love you so much!

And God is good too baby girl. You see, mummy is getting alittle bigger each day with you. But I’ll make an effort everyday to buy one thing for you that you’ll need. I only get the necessities as we know many others will donate or buy you things like clothes. And just yesterday, Godma Jane gave us a baby carrier from her best friend, Aunt Lilian from America! And it’s a branded Bjorn one too! How blessed you are! And Grandaunt Jen from Australia got you kangaroo shoes, and Ah Gong got you shoes hand made from Italy! You’re not even born, yet you’re already having more shoes than Mummy herself!

And the other day, Mummy bought your diapers. I wonder how sweet and small your bum is going to be! It was a steal as supermarkets were selling it for almost $20, but Mummy got it for $13 from a provisional store near the office. Praise God for saving that money! Because that $7 difference, Mummy could get wet wipes for you too! I hope we will learn together how to save money and use it wisely. Money can always be earned, but it’s better to use it wisely too alright?

Alright darling girl. You’re 6 months old now in mummy’s tummy. Very soon you’ll arrive. And we can’t wait.

Love you dearly.

20th February 2013

Dear Sweetheart,

Daddy gotten a special call for a better job interview tomorrow. A design Engineer position. Let’s keep our fingers crossed and offer up our prayers for him. Mummy has been having a rough time at work, and some even bully you while you’re in mummy’s tummy. But I love you and will protect you. I think it’s time for mummy to move on to greener pastures after my leave is over. But don’t worry dear, you come first. You hold more importance than any job in the world.

You know dear, every morning mummy wakes up early to make sure both Daddy and Mummy gets good proper breakfast. A nice healthy sandwich most of the time. The reason because I love you darling girl, and am trying to make sure you get the nutrients you need, and Daddy too so he lives more healthily. I hope you’ll see the important of healthy living when you’re here. But you know what? You have a sweet tooth like the both of us. That’s why every evening mummy must have some chocolate, ice cream or something sweet. I recently bought the sweetest mangoes (expensive) from Philippines. And you did a flip after eating it. I guess you like it a lot. J

And Mummy have been searching for a consecration prayer for you to Mama Mary. I hope to find one suitable and consecrate you to our Heavenly Father even when you’re inside me. I hope you’ll live ot be a good person and living a good holy life.

I’m counting down darling… it’s 23 weeks now and I’m excited for your birth.

Love you.

18 February 2013

Your kicks are getting stronger each day. And it’s more prominent too. I believe I even felt your little elbow jabbing into me yesterday. What joy you bring. Daddy and Mummy attend Aunt Mallory’s rite of sending off and rite of election for her baptism preparation yesterday and it got me thinking about you. How wonderful it is that God created you and I want to consecrate you to the Lord. He created and knew you before you were even born. And Mummy and Daddy’s undying love for you is getting greater each day. Our sweet child… how much we adore you.

Today I read, you’re the size of a beautifully ripe mango and should weigh approximately 450-500g. I can’t stop thinking of your sweet hands and feet, and the cutest cheeks. I bet I’ll just stare at you all day long when you’re born. Mummy found out about the low lying placenta which can be very dangerous for mothers to go through during delivery. But whatever it is my dear, I’ll do anything for you, even risking my life. I know we are in God’s wonderful hands and all is well.

By the way my dear child, Daddy and Mummy has come up with a name for you… hopefully you’ll grow gracefully according to it and love it too.

Natanya Gabrielle Danaraj.

Do you like that name?

Natanya was given by God that ended with a computer glitz. We were strolling down a page with names when we found ‘Netanya’… and God decided to switch Mummy’s laptop off immediately after we got all the info about it.

And Gabrielle because Daddy asked you what letter you would like your name to start with… and if you like it, to jab mummy in my tummy to say you like it. And you jab for ‘G’ and ‘K’.

And since you’re a special miracle message to the world, a wonderful message of life like Jesus, and I always have a soft spot for Gabriel (I think he’s my guardian angel too)… so Gabrielle it is.

You sound so exotic, well versed, mystically lovely, sweet and endearing… Plus Netanya means ‘God’s gift’ while Gabrielle means ‘God gives strength’. You’re a strong gift from God J

I hope you like that name… we love it so far… unless you don’t like it baby girl, give mummy a little jab in the ribs will you? J

Love you so much my girl.

13 February 2013

Today is Ash Wednesday dear. It’s when we we attend mass and through the sacramental ashes, we are reminded to turn from sin, and to stay faithful to the gospel. A reminder that we are only dust and will return to dust upon death. And what is important is our soul and spiritual life, and life doesn’t end, it continues with the Lord if we choose it so. And Daddy and mummy went for mass today. And we prayed for you too. We hope you’ll see the importance of need for spiritual guidance in life because without God, life is meaningless. Without God, there wouldn’t be you.

Anyhow, we also went for our next check up with you. We got to see a 3D image of you and you’re beautiful. It looks like you have Daddy’s nose and ears, and Mummy’s mouth and eyes. Thank God that all your organs and functions are good and well. However, mummy’s placenta is lying quite low but nothing to fret about now. Hopefully with your growth, it will move so mummy can deliver you naturally. But in a case if mummy needs a C section, so be it. I’ll go through anything to bring you safely into this world my love.

We got to see your perfect fingers, all five of them, and you’re the shyest baby I’ve seen. You kept hiding your face from the scanner. You are so adorable. But you let Daddy and Mummy to have a peak of your beautiful face. I wonder how cute you will be when you fatten up. Right now, you’re 450g, about 16cm long and 22 weeks 3 days old. You have the cutest feet and thighs. I feel like I could just kiss you to bits! There was afew seconds when you put your hands like a hamster and mummy called you my dearest hamster. Doctor Ong laughed about it.

Thank God for this smooth successful scan and Praise the Lord for your creation. You are gorgeous darling girl. Absolutely perfect. And we love you so much. So so so much.

11 February 2013

Shocking News. Pope Benedict today resigned my dear. The shortest reign yet oldest pope ever.

But we all know Gods will be done. We will keep praying okay?

10 February 2013

It’s Chinese New Year today Baby girl. Year of the Water Snake. And the special thing about this year baby girl is your birth! And we are all so excited! Actually don’t believe in superstition, only in The Lord’s plan. So anything else doesn’t matter.

Today Mummy and Daddy had to work harder because of Ahma and Grandma Lily. They are old and busy entertaining guests, so we must help them with cleaning and errands. Daddy did a lot more because Mummy is carrying you. But still, I pray you will see the importance of respecting and taking care of the elders. They need lots of care and love too. Hopefully when we grow old, you will love and care for us. But you see Baby girl, life is about loving others. And when we love others, we love God. That’s the simple truth of life.

Love the Lord first and love your neighbour. The two most important commandments.

BTW, today Daddy did an experiment with you. He speaks to you every night. Quality time with you is what I call it. I wish you can see how tender loving he is when he speaks to you in mummy’s tummy. He calls you his Baby Girl. He shares his wishes and dream with you every night. Occasionally he will read a bible story or a nursery rhyme to you, while mummy does her nonsensical dancing and singing with you too. How much we adore you little one. You should see how silly we can get!

And daddy today asked you what alphabet would you like your second name to start with. And told you to kick mummy’s tummy when you make your choice. Then he started with A, B, C, etc… and when it came to G and K, sweetheart, you gave the hardest kick! How awesome is that! So now Daddy is cracking his head about it… heehee.

But Baby dear, you bring such joy. A huge joy to everyone.

PS: Daddy got you your stroller! It’s a miracle itself and all Thanks to God! It’s really expensive to get one from the store ($450 to $1000). And suddenly, Daddy’s friend (a durian seller) had an extra unused one! It’s worth $750 but he sold it to Daddy for $150! How glorious is that! And when Daddy brought it home, all he could say was:

‘Only the best for my Baby Girl’.

Daddy and Mummy loves you sweetheart. A lot.

9 February 2013

Dear Sweetheart,

After attending Ah-Gong’s reunion dinner with the Lum family, Grand Aunt Esther advised Mummy to eat some black chicken soup that would be nourishing for you. So mummy listened blindly and went ahead yesterday to eat it. Unfortunately, Mummy fell so sick. Blood pressure fell to 80 (below normal) and was worried about you. I’m so terribly sorry for doing these silly things that can harm you. I’m so sorry baby girl. Mummy will be more wise now. Mummy ended up resting in bed today, sick with a cold and low BP. But again, no medication because it’s harmful to you. May the Lord heal Mummy quickly and safely.

And while resting sweetie, Mummy decided to share your story to the PCOS forum which Mummy signed up for. It’s a forum where women with PCOS (Mummy has this disorder) who cannot conceive. But you see, you are mummy’s miracle baby. So I shared our heartwarming story about you with other mothers-to-be. And they all love you and adore how God created you.

So you see how special you are? Even when you’re in Mummy’s tummy my dearest girl, you are an inspiration to many.

1 February 2013

Dear Sweetheart,

Everyday as you kick inside of me, my love grows for you even more.
How much will i put my life on the line for you. I'll rather lose mine than to lose you.
How dearly i love you my dearest baby girl.

I've gotten you the sweetest retro dress that comes with a headband and bloomers, but you have to wait till you're 3 months old to wear it. It's going to be a little too big for you when you're born.

Grandma Nanna also have been going on a shopping spree. She got you some cute mittens and booties, and Uncle Bern's sister is also donating some clothes for you too. How loved you are, and you're still in Mummy's tummy!

Your kicks are alot stronger now and i love when you kick Mummy to tell me that 'Hey, i'm here Mum!'.

We all love you dearly sweetheart. And we pray you're healthy and happy.

Love,
Mum

A Poem For You

Mothers Touch
by Kristi D. Hadley-Godeker

I’m so afraid with her I might make a mistake.
To discipline the situation, always a risk to take.
I may get so angry, and yell so loud...
Wanting her to be a good girl, make me proud.
So young in age, though older in mind...
The biggest part of her so loving gentle and kind.
I want her to have a good future, really succeed.
Working long hours, hard to give her the attention she does need.
One day in her future she will know my love is true.
All the sacrifices will be seen, as with her little girl, wondering what to do.
I look at her so pretty it frightens me, the best reward is molding her into the person she will be.
I see her changing right before my eyes, nervous for I get only so many tries.
Remember friendship will develop later as she’s an adult.
After she’s lived life and knows the way it felt.
I will get her ready for life that can hurt so much
Then and only then...
She will be thankful I guided her with a mothers touch.

28 January 2013

Dear Baby,

You are officially a GIRL!

We got to see your stomach and your heartbeat is beautiful. 300g heavy and 13cm long from head to rump.

And you showed us your beautiful fingers... 1.2cm long.

You're perfect. Absolutely. Can't wait to hold you and kiss you. You're so beautifully adorable.

But Dr Ong told Mummy that i've gained too much weight too fast. In 1 month i've put on 4kg. So Mummy has to cut down on milk and milo... But it's okay. It's anything for you Baby Girl Dear.

Love you.

Praise the Lord!

26 January 2013

Dear Baby,

Yesterday something beautiful happened.

We were looking for a girls name, and you know it is with Daddy and Mummy trying to figure it out. But a miracle happened.

We were sourcing for names, and as we were strolling down the page, we came upon 'Netanya' on the internet. 'Netanya' means 'God's Gift' and is a Hebrew name in the bible for one of the Levi leaders to spread God's word. And it is also ironically, a beautiful tourist spot in Israel, just above Jerusalem. Not only is it uncommon, but it is an exotic cultured meaningful name as well! And suddenly, the page just disappeared. As if someone close/deleted the page, never to find it or stroll for more options again. And that was it! It was a great sign! If you're a girl, you're definitely going to be Netanya. Beautiful name...

Now Daddy and I are pondering over a boys name. If a girls name is so beautifully exotic, we are rethinking on Evan... But we will see. it's 2 days time to seeing you our beautiful baby! We are just sooo excited!

Can't wait to see how much you've grown. I wonder if you'll suck your thumb now. And i really miss your kicks right now... Can you kick or stretch please? I love it when you snuggle and move sweetie.

Our sweet baby... we so love you.

22 January 2013

Dear Baby,

Today, Daddy tried to wake you up by saying 'Wakie Wakie' near Mummy's tummy. And guess what little one? You kicked. And you kicked right into Mummy's bladder. Ouch. But it's so funny because you tried kicking Daddy's cheek. You are an absolute adorable fella. We are simply excited and counting down to next Monday to 'see' you again dear. It's so exciting. I can't wait to see how much you've grown and to get a confirmation of your kicks and turns. And you may even surprise us by telling us if you're a girl or boy. Oh Gosh... We so love you so much!

And sweetheart, Mummy's been a little cranky recently, but just want to share with you the beauty of the rosary. I started praying it again, and with Mama Mary's intercession and Jesus, Mummy's feeling alot better now. I really hope one day you'll see the beauty of prayer. And i can't wait for you to start praying too.

Love, Mummy.

19 January 2013

Dear Baby,

Mummy had a crying fit last night. I was getting cheesed off so easily by the smallest things, and Daddy came to the rescue. He held me tight and Mummy had a huge cry out session. It's not you sweetie, it's the hormone. I guess this is another symptom. But gosh... it's very scary because Mummy doesn't know why she's crying. Thank God for the rosary. Mummy prayed with you, and hopefully you'll pray it too one day. Felt peace and calmness with Mama Mary's intercession. But it's all okay love. As long it's for you, it's worth it. Just poor Daddy has to deal with it too.

Ps: Daddy is a real star. He is sooo patient and sooo kind. And he knows so easily just how to comfort Mummy. I pray that you'll be like Daddy... a comfort creature in the world. :)

18 January 2013

Dear Baby,

Mummy can't help looking at you and wondering what you're doing. I always take some time alone just to enjoy your kicks and movement. You bring such lovely joy. Yesterday, Daddy noticed that you've been marked by God. Yes, on Mummy's tummy appeared a cross. Daddy took a photo and mummy will load it up soon. But that's just you sweetie, a miracle child given by God. No wonder a cross stands upon you. I pray that God will always care for you and Jesus is always keeping you company.

Uncle Siva and Aunt Jane bought you some Bach and Mozart. They are just trilled about you baby. Aunt Jane is going to be your Godmother too. We know you'll be in good hands. Aunt Jane was also telling mummy not to smell all the cleaning agents, what to eat and not to eat for you, to come out with a plan to make sure you eat your vegetables... You see darling, everyone is excited about you.

Daddy and Mummy also have made a decision to see you by ourselves on 28 Jan for the next scan. We leave it up to you to decide to let us find out if you're a girl or boy. But the idea of just seeing you kick and stretch is so excilarating! We can't wait.

And yesterday baby, Mummy found out by our dailing apple consumption will help the growth of your beautiful lungs (yes, Mummy keeps eating an apple a day for you). I'm just praying that your development is all good. Recently, Mummy finds it difficult to breathe. It's normal... because now Mummy's lungs must breathe for the two of us, so Mummy has a little difficulty. But isn't it a beautiful thing? Knowing the oxygen i take in will go to you... Mummy is going to be selfish now with the air i breathe... haha.

And Daddy reminded me yesterday to listen to God more. Mummy has been feeling abit down and disturbed, and have been seeking peace for some time. I pray that this time may we find peace in my heart so that you'll bestowed peace too love.

Gosh... 10 more days to seeing you again. :)

Love you my dearest baby... Daddy and Mummy loves you.

Ps: Daddy caught the flu and have been sick since before Christmas. Hope he gets well soon k? He's been sleeping in the living room so that Mummy won't get sick... See the sacrifice Daddy makes? And do you know, that Mummy finds it more difficult to sleep without Daddy by my side? Somehow, Daddy must have his hands on you (mummy's tummy) then Mummy can sleep... is that you baby? And when you arrive, Mummy will make sure Daddy gets a flu jab alright? :) We must all be healthy.

11 January 2013

Dear Baby,

Gosh… Mummy has turned into a one mean farting machine! The hormones have slowed down Mummy’s digestion to take care of you in Mummy’s body, so all the food have slowed down now. But my goodness… Mummy’s fart is terrible! Daddy suffers too. It was so bad Daddy says it leaves a lingering taste. TMI. But Mummy is more than willing to go through all of this for you. I’ve read that peppermint tea may help, so Mummy’s been gulping it down at work.

And recently, I’ve been getting really weird dreams and nightmares. It is also due to the hormones. This experience darling of your wonderful growth also comes to be quite perculiar to me. Mummy doesn’t go through the common symptoms. Been through the food aversions, the highs and lows of emotions, the early swollen feet, weird nightmares and now, a farting machine. I just find it so funny, don’t you think? But it’s all worth it darling because of you.

Last night, Mummy was just staring at my tummy wondering about you. How special you are and how special it is to love you before seeing you. You are that special love.

Today, after having another nightmare, I went to work worried. But this morning, Mummy felt your tiny tickly kicks and was so comforted. It’s so tiny baby… you can’t imagine. I can only imagine how tiny your feet are… perfect and beautiful too. But I love your kicks sweetie. They are absolutely a ripple of joy.

Love you so dearly.

6 January 2013

My dear Sweetheart,

It's a new year now, and it's dawning on me that you're arriving soon. What an exciting thought it is. I've been reading books about labour, and sweetie, Mummy is a little freaked out. It's scary and no one know what can happen, only God. But to know that we are bringing you into this world, it pays off.

You've been kicking alot recently, which is a real blessing. Daddy felt your kicks. He was so amazed. Daddy has always been talking to you and kissing you while you're in Mummy's tummy. And he's been reading special stories from the children's bible to you too. We wonder if you can hear us. Our favourite time of the day is in the evening, just before going to bed, where it's just you, Daddy and me, and we are quietly admiring your development, your sweet kicks and wondering what kind of kid you will be. We have so many plans for you, but we know you can only be who you are. You're kicking again as i type! your kicks are like the cutest lightest thugs under my skin. It's so amazing.

We are still awaiting for the next scan. We wonder if you're a girl or boy... whichever it is, we just want you healthy and happy. I'm sorry Mummy struggles with stress from work or stress from people around me... Mummy still has to do physical labour at work and it's such a struggle. I know i have to leave once you come out. I can't be in a job that takes my strength away when i should be focusing on you. I pray that God will guide and help us out with Mummy's work.

And recently sweetie, i think the womb that is keeping you has been lying onto Mummy's back, that i get backaches quite often now. But it's okay. i realise that when i lie on my side then the pain goes away. But it's all worth it becaus ei know my baby is growing healthy.

I can't wait to kiss your cheeks and smell you and hold you close... there's so much love for you going on now, i can't imagine when you come out.

Love you baby D...